i think my mom watched the whole time
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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