Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
