THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
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Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
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This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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