youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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