Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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