Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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