It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
