I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
