No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
