I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize