I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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