Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny

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(315): View more from New York

Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love

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(225): View more from Louisiana

things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.

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(604): View more from British Columbia

I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.

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(562): View more from California

Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.

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(985): View more from Louisiana

I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day

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(707): View more from California

New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice

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(650): View more from California

Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.

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