if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Randomize
