Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
