so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I stole a fireplace last night.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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