They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
