i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize