i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
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Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
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She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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