I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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