What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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