I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
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