And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
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