her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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