Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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