I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law