Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
