I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
