it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Randomize
