i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
