bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
