Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
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