Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Randomize
