In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
