Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.�
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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