I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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