Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
