she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
