I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Pooping to opera.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
