i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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