I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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