I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
It was like getting head from an anaconda
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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