i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
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