You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
