Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
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