He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
i just made my gag reflex go away.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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