woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
and you fell through a lawn chair
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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