making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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