Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
