She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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