Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
