i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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