Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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